little and me

Photos by Toni Bouton Photography

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so quiet down, cobwebs. dust go to sleep.

Mother, oh Mother, come shake out your cloth

Empty the dustpan, poison the moth,

Hang out the washing and butter the bread,

Sew on a button and make up a bed.

Where is the mother whose house is so shocking?

She's up in the nursery, blissfully rocking.

Oh, I've grown shiftless as Little Boy Blue

Lullaby, rockaby, lullaby loo

Dishes are waiting and bills are past due

Pat-a-cake, darling, and peek, peekaboo.

The shopping's not done and there's nothing for stew

And out in the yard there's a hullabaloo

But I'm playing kanga and this is my roo

Look! Aren't her eyes the most wonderful hue?

Lullaby, rockaby, lullaby loo

The cleaning and scrubbing will wait till tomorrow,

For children grow up, as I've learned to my sorrow.

So quiet down, cobwebs.

Dust go to sleep.

I'm rocking my baby and babies don't keep.

-Ruth Hulbert Hamilton

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going home

Salem got dressed in her best and came home on March 27th. She wore the dress that I made for her and a bonnet that was worn by Lael, Ruthie and me as babies.

I've gotta shoot you straight. I was kind of scared out of my mind coming home with this third child of ours. I will probably never forget the ride home from the hospital and how I felt about walking into our house with two other children waiting for us. It was daunting. Lael and Ruthie are good girls, they really are, but they are 3 and 22 months and they are needy. They take every bit of energy out of us emotionally, mentally and physically and the thought of bringing in another extremely dependent little being was pretty much rocking my world. 

One thing that really helped me was to remember that I felt exactly the same way when we brought Ruthie home, and you know what... we made it. Minute by minute, hour by hour, day by day and week by week we all survived and we actually had fun doing it. When I imagined our new life with three children I didn't question whether or not we could handle them, but I feared a little that maybe it would be so much that we wouldn't enjoy them. I should've never worried about that because even with the extra work load it really has been such a joy. I love having a newborn. Like, love. it. I don't know if I will ever not have baby fever, so having Salem around to hold, cuddle and stare at all day is like a little slice of heaven for me. Lael and Ruthie have adjusted so well and I have seen no signs of jealousy or changes in their behavior. They adore their new sister.

At night if I look back at the events of my day I admit that there was a lot of crying, a lot of "no", "please stop doing that","don't touch her", "please open the door", "please shut the door",

a lot of poop, a lot of diapers, a lot of food preparation, a lot of me sighing and rolling my eyes to myself (I'm working on that), a lot of counting- "You need to come here, 1...2...3.", a lot of boo boos, a lot of mess, and a LOT of cleaning up. 

And then I think, "How did I do that?" and "WHY?!"

That's when I remember all of the little things that happened that day that made it all worth it like Lael telling me that Salem looks like G-Daddy (um, okay??), her putting a blanket on Salem and saying she was all "comter-full", Ruthie asking me to take a nap (um, okay!!), watching them run around our yard in pajamas, beach shoes and bike helmets, the way Salem felt all snuggled up to me while we napped on the couch and her sweet contentment while I nursed her, Lael telling me that angels are in heaven with God and Jesus and listening to Ruthie pray before going to bed.

Doesn't take a whole lot to put things in perspective. I'm crazy blessed. I don't deserve these children of mine. This motherhood stuff is hard work. Much of it is the daily grind but I've said it once and I'll say it again... I wouldn't want to be anywhere or do anything else. 

I thank God for this toil He has given me.

I have no words for this.

But this pretty much sums up how we felt that day...

To God be the glory, great things He has done.

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in the hospital

As soon as she was born I couldn't wait to get some shampoo in that hair of hers...

Once we got to our room Trey assisted our nurse in giving her the first bath. At our hospital EVERYTHING is done in the room. Your baby stays with you during your entire stay, so all tests, shots, bloodwork, etc. are done right there. 
The nursery no longer exists... 
don't even get me started on that. 
They call this "baby friendly".  
I would like to point out that this is not "mommy friendly". 
That first night you feel like you've been hit by a mack truck and then guess what, you now have a screaming new born who wants to be held 24/7 and then guess what, you're on your own, kids. No more nurses who sit around and rock babies. Those good ol' days are over, folks.

Quite frequently Trey likes to impersonate our children's wacky behavior. This was him doing Salem.

Squeaky clean and baby soft.

Crazy Uncle Bryan hasn't changed much...

Salem 2013

Ruthie 2011

Lael 2009

Salem and Calvin met for the first time...

 and our Pastor, Brian Habig came to meet Salem and pray over her.

Next up, going home.

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Salem meets the girls... dun dun duuuuuuuun!

When I imagined Salem meeting her sisters for the first time I couldn't help but think of the scene in Finding Nemo when the door to the dentist office swings open and there stands DARLA. 
My pure, healthy, untouched little Nemo was about to be mauled by my two little Darlas, and I was just going to have to be okay with that. It was going to happen eventually, so I took a deep breath and let 'em at her.
(You can see Lael meeting Ruthie here.)

Lael loves to count her fingers and toes...

and "get her checked up" with the doctor gloves...

And then it sinks in... 

What have we DONE?!

There are now three little human beings who depend on us for every.thing.

We're exhausted, but we're so happy.

Deliriously happy.

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